Please don’t clap until we get through the PAs.

As we celebrate the one week anniversary of the 83rd Annual Academy Awards I feel the need to get something off my chest.

What’s the deal with the “In Memoriam” portion of the Oscars?

Just the fact that they use “In Memoriam” is blog post on its own.  But then again,  I suppose it’s better than “in Memory of” with its messy dangling preposition.

The memorial tribute at the Oscars has always been an oddly politicized segment.  We wish to honor the folks who passed but then we inadvertently — or maybe advertently — rank them in order of importance through the clapping of hands or lack there of.  It’s Hollywood’s way of giving you a kick in the shorts on your way out.

Undisputed future "In Memoriam" candidate

And is advertently even a word?

The applause is inevitably great for the likes of Jimmy Stewart or Jack Lemmon but rather sparse for the 1st AD from Casablanca and the script supervisor for Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?  (By the way — I am.)

And each year there seems to be at least one major slight.  Last year is it was Farrah Fawcett and Bea Arthur — talk about opposite ends of a spectrum.

This year we shed tears over Lynn Redgrave, Leslie Nielsen, Tony Curtis, Jill Clayburgh, Dennis Hopper, Lena Horne and the now famous publicist Ronni Chasen.   Ronni would not have made the list had she slipped away peacefully in her sleep.  But get five bullets pumped into your chest along Sunset Boulevard — the good part of Sunset Boulevard — and your in.

And maybe that’s what Corey Haim should have done.  Maybe he needed a better publicist — and Ronni was available at the time.  A publicist could have floated a better story of his demise as opposed to what actually happened — keeling over in the hallway of his Oakwood Apartment, halfway between the bedroom and the bathroom.

Corey was snubbed.  The good Corey.

And this snubbing occurred after the SAG awards gave him the cold shoulder  — and they only memorialize actors.    Mr. Feldman — aka ‘the other Corey’ — even called them out publicly.  This goes to prove two things:

1.  No one watches the SAG Awards.

2. Or listens to Corey Feldman.

But I think we can all agree on one thing:  Mr. Feldman can now be referred to as ‘the not dead Corey.’

I wish to point out that Anne Francis was on this year’s list and she technically died in 2011.  Well, not technically…actually.    And as great as Ann Francis was…

…she was no Corey Haim.

1971 – 2010 RIP

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2 thoughts on “Please don’t clap until we get through the PAs.

  1. Laura says:

    Also, to millions of 40-something girls (and some boys) around the world, he was cute Corey.
    This sounds gross and morbid, but I always look forward to the “In Memoriam” because…well just because.

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