Joys of Fatherhood Pt 1: What Day is it?

Right now, as I type this, my two daughters are arguing over what day of the week it is.  (It’s Sunday for those of you peeking up at your menu bar.)  But that’s not important to Violet and Ava.  They are debating over the pretend day of the week.

Allow me to explain. 

The girls are involved in a robust game of pretend.   A fantasy game of life where they inhabit characters in a story they make up as they go along…or copy what they saw on Netflix the night before.  Usually they pretend they are sisters — big stretch of the acting chops — or orphans or sisters who are orphans.  That’s a popular one and I choose to not read too deeply into the psychology of it all.  But today I don’t know which pretend game they are playing, and to be honest — and a horrible parent to boot — I don’t care.  As long as my little angels play nicely and orderly and don’t hurt one another.

And keep their crap out of the living room.  They have playroom, so go play in it.

But the argument du jour is what day is it in this make-believe storyline.  Because in pretend play it’s all in the details.

Where are we?  A house in the country.  Check.

What’s our names?  Sara and Ella.  Check.

What day of the week is it?  Saturday.  No Sunday!  I said Saturday!  Check.

It’s for character motivation I suppose.  I wouldn’t know as I am a writer and prefer to stay behind the camera.

Who you gonna call?

Today they are pretending it’s family portrait day — so I’m guessing no orphanage storyline.  Their characters are getting dressed up before they head off to the portrait studio.  Violet insists it is Saturday because that’s when people go to a portrait studio.  Everyone is home from work and school.  And the mall is open.

Okay.  So we sometimes go to Sears.  Can we move along?

Ava insists that it is Sunday.  And Sunday is a perfectly good day to have a family photo taken as we are all dressed up from going to church.  I don’t know where she gets this idea.  We have never dressed up for church.  Because we have never gone to church.

My solution?

I told them to get their crap out of the living room and go play in the playroom.  Today.

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